Watch for Taxis

Sometimes I see a film coming out, and I just can’t help but wonder if it’s going to have an impact on an entire industry, for good or ill. We all know what happened when Finding Reno came out, and suddenly everyone was getting purposefully lost in the desert just so they also could attempt to locate the city of Reno without a map. People died doing that.

Now we have the upcoming Cab-Lane Marbles, which promises the taciturn depiction of a woman slowly losing her sanity while driving a taxi, but I’m wondering what it’s going to do to the automotive industry. I bet my regular car servicing in Caulfield is going to be swamped with all these people rushing out to buy taxis, so that they can drive them around just like Carlie Denver does in the movie, except they also will be swamped by people requesting their services because they think it’s an actual taxi, which it is not. Maybe a small percentage of them will become taxi drivers, but many will realise that this is exactly the poor decision-making the movie warned them about and have to sell the taxi.

That’s the future, if this movie ends up being popular. I guess car repairs and servicing garages will have plenty to do, but think of us folks out there driving. All these unqualified cab drivers on the roads, thinking they’re the hero of Cab-Lane Marbles because they’ve kept their sanity for all of five minutes. So annoying, I just know it’s going to be the worst.  

Still, it’s not as bad as when Aghast at the Blusterous movies were popular. All these young folks trying to drift race, amazed when their engines exploded after being filled with weird chemicals. Waiting lists for car servicing garages going on for ironic miles because of irresponsibility…I don’t want to live through that again.

-Morris