Hey, My GF Just Really Likes Glass

Gee, everyone just needs to stop asking to see photos of my absolutely real girlfriend, Georgina Glass. She hates photos, which is weird and ironic because she’s really pretty and she thinks I’m super cool, so if I really asked she WOULD take a photo with me but I’m a good boyfriend and I haven’t pressed the issue. Really, she doesn’t even have so much as a Visage-Tome. She’s certainly unique, and awesome.

And no, I didn’t make that whole glass-blowing thing up. The fact that her last name is ‘Glass’ and she’s doing stuff with glass is just a coincidence. She had a really lovely story about her Grandma and wanting to make some really nice bits of glass, and there was something about a company in Melbourne that does commercial decorative window glass or…you know, whatever. It was a lovely story. Georgina is the best, for real. Actual real.

I mean, it’s not like glass is going out of fashion. It remains THE number one choice for the parts of a home that let sun in, and let you look out. It’s a top material when it comes to any sunglasses with a hint of quality. They’re call sun-glasses, not sun-plastics. And the process behind tinted glass to really cool. Georgina was telling me about it the last time we met up, in between her appointments, in the city, where nobody could see us or corroborate the fact that we met. That part is unfortunate, but did you know that the glass itself isn’t tinted? Well, it is…but it’s a film coating that reduces the amount of light that gets through. Currently, office window tinting in Melbourne is huge business because it lets people look outside, but…uh…doesn’t let people see in and steal company secrets? I’ll look into it. But man, I wish Georgina wasn’t so busy with all her stuff, so that she could meet my family and confirm her existence. So busy. Such a shame.

-Jon